Monday, September 22, 2014
A couple of post back in my journal, I commented that I would most likely post my results until I did not do well in an event. This weekend, I fenced on the coast in a tournament. In the words of a former wheelchair fencer friend of mine, " I stunk out loud."
In my own defense, I was exhausted. But even at my best I could not have defeated a couple of these kids. They are just to fast and skilled for me. What bothers me a bit is I did not fence well. Did I disrupt their prep? Nope. Could I figure out how to flick or get hand shots ? Nope. Did I do second intention actions? Nada. If they were primarily a foilist, did I make actions to offset their game? Nope. Did I get hit by the same counter attack four times in a row without adapting. Yep.
Okay...I did not do well. It will not be the last time it happens. Here is the really weird thing. It did not bother me very much. I am the type of fencer that when this happens, I beat myself up over it for days. If it happens twice in a row, I go into a kind of fencer depression. This time it did not bother me. I am a bit embarrassed. I hate I fenced like that in front of the ref, because I know him.
Other than that, I does not bother me very much. Could it be that I finally do not judge my self worth as a person or ability as a fencer by a few minutes on strip? Nahhh. I am not that smart. I truly think it is something else. I have no idea what.
Prior to this tournament, I had been happy that in the first three events of the season, I had fenced consistently above mediocre. Consistency. I don't know what I was thinking. If you are a great/very good fencer ( I have my own idea about what makes a great/very good fencer. You may not share that view.) then consistency is/may be of importance. At my level of ability, it is meaningless. Epee tournaments have to many variables. Who you get in pools. Who you draw for your first DE. I have no way to statistically prove this, but I think it may be even more random for vet fencers. May not. I tend to watch the results of vet fencers in my division. Unless they are one of the gods, results seem to swing a great deal. Not sure about this. It warrants further attention.