Monday, November 6, 2006

Who Knows?

Anne will never heal completely. The bones in her feet will always break. Nothing can be done She cannot (should not) walk.

I have always shared domestic duties around the house. I will need to do most all of it now.

I need to look into wheel chairs this week and perhaps a bed for downstairs. All the bedrooms are upstairs at present.

It may be that as time goes by I can adapt and find time for fencing. Though I doubt it will be at the pace I have gone at it of late. I did not go to foil tonight. I am paid up for the month at UNC. What to do there?

I am a selfish man, who does not willing sacrifice his love....his passions. Yet, what can be done here, except to do those very things.

I hope things work out to a point where I can fence and not feel guilty about doing it. Anne has told me she wants me to not give this up for her, but I do not see how I cannot make some major changes.

Just rambling on this post. Only time will tell if I can find away to continue fencing.


fencerkath said...

I don't think there's anything helpful I can say - I can just say how sorry I am that this should happen to Anne and you.

All I can offer is the thought that I would like to fence more and be better but I've always knowm that family responsibilities (as well as lack of aptitude) prevent me from doing more.  I still love my fencing nights and doing my best with an epee in hand.  I have friends at the club and I get to live out some of my fanatasies about Cyrano et al., albeit in a rather tame manner.  I don't know if that would beenough for you as youi are a better and more serious fencer.  But some weeks the thought of fencing one night a week keeps me going.

shazna02 said...

really sorry to hear about anne and your new reality - I hope things start looking better soon.