I went to foil Monday night. I did almost nothing, but I did do a tiny bit of foot work without lunging. My leg seems okay.
A friend left that night. It got me to thinking.
This Sunday I plan to go to a ref seminar. I am trying to become a foilist. To do that, I must increase my skills at refing It is all one big chain of goals. I want to be a fencer, so I figure I need to be a foilist. The club needs another foil coach and becoming a better ref is one of the ways I can bring some small skill in that regard to the table. I have been on and on about these goals.
But after some more thought, I really do not want to do them all that much. I keep trying to be a foilist. Truth is, I just do not like foil. I keep doing this because I need to be a coach. I don't know enough to be a coach and I do not want to be one. At least not a full time one. I can help with a beginner class and fill in if needed of course, but that is all I fill qualified to do. I do not even know how I ended up going down this "coachy" path.
I want to fence epee and I want to be better at that weapon. That is all I want. I would go to the other classes, but only to do footwork and to take what I could from those weapons and adpat it to epee. I still want to pursue my goals (foil;coaching;being a ref; armory), but not at a frantic pace. I want to dabble in the other things (foil;coaching;being a ref; armory) and truly study epee. I think it is the only true fencing. I am not trying to start a fight here, it is just what I believe
There is no other place to study epee in Greensboro that I know of. That leaves UNC. ( Long drive and unfriendly people). I can work out more and loose weight. I can fence in tournaments as much as possible and buy some fencing DVDs to watch. That is all I can think of that can help me. Unless some great fencing master moves to Greensboro and wants to teach a vet to fence epee, I just do not see a way for me to improve. I know Cam can still show me some things, but there is never enough time and I think I need more.
I have given some thought to hanging up fencing lately. The problem there is, I like the people at my club so much and I have no passion to replace fencing with. What would I do without fencing? Most likely I would go home every night and plop my butt in front of the TV (I hate TV for the most part) or the computer. When I am on the computer, all I read is about fencing. Though I have spent some time this week looking at pictures of Kate Beckinsale.
But there is something bothering me about fencing lately. I woke up this morning thinking about what is wrong and could not go back to sleep. ( Note: After some comments, I changed part of this post. Sooooo, some of the comments related more prior to this change.)
Perhaps this is just the fatigue of my job from the last couple of weeks talking. I will see how it goes. Friday is epee, that always seems to help.